What it’s like for a sibling?

A couple of days ago we were all out for lunch as a family. I had taken most of the day off after a busy week of travelling for work. I have been trying really hard to be conscience of how this is all impacting Carly but at lunch the other day I realized how hard it has been. She said “You guys argue so much.” I said “What do you mean?” She said “You guys are always so serious and talking about so much.” I then realized that my sensitive sweet girl is picking up on the stress and anxiety we are feeling as we prepare for William’s surgery. This also made me realize that we need to be mindful of not talking about the surgery and preparing for it too much while kids are up. I find that it is always on my mind so I need to take more times to just chill, be goofy with kids and take some downtime myself. I decided to then ask Carly some questions and this is how she answered.

Do you have any concerns about William’s surgery?

“I’m feeling a little scared.” “I have a weird feeling.”

Do you find it hard that you know Mom and Dad will be at the hospital a lot?

“It’s hard because I won’t get to spend much time with you.”

What would help you to make things easier when we are not around?

“If I had a special small stuffie with a clip on it and I could carry it everywhere I went. You can put hugs and kisses in it and then I have them for whenever I need them. I would also like to bring Lion, and my dolls and some of my favorite things.”

She also said William is going to really miss playing hockey and running around and I’m sad for that.

Any family going through a difficult time together will have ups and downs but I know that the best thing we have done was to talk about it together and be honest about what is going on in an age appropriate way.  Now time to find a stuffie on a key chain!

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